Sarz In The Starz: Pedophiles.

Sarz In The Starz: Pedophiles.: "Think about society for a moment people. For centuries middle aged and old men married girls as young as 9-10 years old. To me it only mak..."

Fucking read this shit. It's awesome.

Lost in Love Paradise

Geez, why is the love disease so freaking chronic??

It's almost like, you never know when you're going to get in, but when it catches up, you're screwed! I am so confused right now. I'd also like to call my "lover" a victim. Seriously, heed warning to anyone that I fall in love with because you're TRAPPED after that. I will not let you go.


But the thing is.. if you haven't told me your TRUE feelings, but you DO love me, then TELL ME!

Anyways...

My heart, right now, is wanting someone of which I cannot contain. I mean my feelings for this person are SO FREAKING STRONG. I love him. I'm not IN love with him. I just love him. but we're friends. Really close friends. And to break any boundaries would be wrong. impossible really. I think he wants something to be there. To be that peice of jigsaw in my puzzle. I know I can't contain my feelings. I know I won't be able to keep it in much longer. Some way, some how he's going to find out. It's going to suck when he does. Because I feel as though he won't feel the saw way back. But get this people, after he finds out, I can still love the fuck out of him. And I will. Forever. 

I know I've said those words before, but I didn't know who I was dealing with. I didn't know I was getting involved with the stupidest jackass in the world. But this guy, I know, is NOT a jackass. I know he's so comfortable with anything. He's calm. He's cool. I wish, just for a second, that he would tell me, even if it's a lie (but I'd prefer it not to be) that he loved me back. 

i love you.

BlogCatalog

I can haz Doujinshi?...[translation please?]

Ok, So, it's near 11 o clock.

I was browsing the web.

And I came across a little something they call "Doujinshi".
What is "Doujinshi", you ask?
I guess I shall tell you.
It's basically fanfic for Anime and Manga.

[Caution: If you are a non-appreciative person of Anime or Manga, I warn you, do not read on.]

Now, people LOVE anime. But . . . how far are they willing to go with this stuff? Now, some of this doujinshi can get pretty graphic. BUT there's another little thingy tied to Doujinshi. It's called Shojo-ai and Shonen-ai.

[Caution: If you are a straight guy or straight girl, and are discriminative against anything REMOTELY homosexual or bisexual, I STRONGLY urge you to NOT read on. Please. And thank you(: ]

Shonen-ai (I'm quite a fan myself) is literally translated into "boy love". Shonen-ai is the cute little stuff like hand-holding, kissing, cuddling. But there's a darker side to it, which is down below.

Shojo-ai, is  translated into "girl love". It also follows the same homosexual categories as Shonen-ai. Except of course, starring chicks. There is also a very darker side.

[Caution: Now, I know you're probably getting tired of this, but for the viewers sake... IF YOU HAVE AN ISSUE WITH PREMATURE EJACULATION DO NOT PURSUE. You'll just jizz all in your pants. But with all seriousness, what's coming up is a very INTERESTING topic. If you are very accepting to homosexual lifestyles, then yes, you may read on!]

Shonen-ai has a darker side, and that side is called Yaoi. Now, yes, yaoi does include holding hands and all that lovey doevey hooplah, but yaoi also contains gay sex. Yes, dick-rubbing-dick action here, people. I am a fan to the not-so-vicous-and-pervy side of Yaoi. Like, say they cuddle naked. I think it's absolutely adorable.

Shojo-ai's darker side is called Yuri. Yes, kitty-on-kitty action. This, I do not really find pleasure in. But the story lines are unique and quite adorable and romantic. I wouldn't see myself enjoying it, but I do have bisexual friends and lesbian friends who like to watch it. I usually fast-forward past the nakedness and stick with the actual story.

But yes, I do have a link where you can find this stuff. This has got to be the best website ever for it. I just discovered it today. The good thing is, only like 5 minutes to register and it's totally non-profit(free).

Here you go: Best Damn Yaoi/Yuri Site!!!

What's wrong with me? Am I a...monster?

Geez. Like, what the hell is wrong with me? Is this the real me? I feel so blah. Like, this isn't me. I know it isn't. What's wrong with me??!

All my life, I've been crazy. Like, [hyped-up-on-cocaine-and-X] crazy. (I'd like to clarify that I've never done either drugs.) But, at this particular age, it's like I've finally reached the climax. I sometimes want to scream "WTF?!" My life is so overrated. First of all, I'm [cr]ucking [f]azy.

Secondly, I don't know what to say out of my [bleep]ing mouth. I just go all out and say the weirdest shit. My mind has issues. I have issues. I'm tooo weird. The weirdness, I like. But it's the issues I can't deal with. Sometimes, I wish I couldn't talk at all. Then people would have no way to judge me or my thoughts, because I wouldn't be speaking them. But I always could just type them. (pure example).

Now, the mouth-speech-thingy also ties into my relationship somewhat. A well conversation with Sean and I usually ends up in a fairly sarcastic argument. And...I can't help that. Well, I could. But my brain won't function. I'm telling it to walk left, and it's trying to race to the right. It's definately like those 2 magnetic poles. North and South. Well, me trying to communicate with my brain is like trying to rub south and south together. [and something about that sentence made me think about yuri for some odd reason...]

So we have the worst arguments EVER. But I'm sure you're not on here to read about my relationship. You read the subtitle.

IM A MONSTER. rawr♥. But no seriously,  I think I have an issue. Bye.


[Self-Quote of the Day: What's the possibility of my inside soul getting consumed by a sinister force?]

Tech-Metal

Pop music is suckish.

Jazz is...meh...it's okaaaay.

I'm a sucker for classical.

Oh metal? Yeah, that's the great stuff. "Music for the aggressive" is what some call it. I call it soul music. Tough stuff. Music that gets my anger out without me doing some stupid stuff. It's the perfect mix for any person jacked up on adrenaline. You can thrash, hop around, curse, scream, yell, cry, get crazy, then you can go nuts with the solos. Whethere they're drum solos, or guitar solos. It's the ultimate experience. Also, it's the kind of music you can blast in your ears. Everyone will stare, but will you care when they ask you to turn it down? Hell no. You'll be too busy jamming it out.

Techno is also a good kind of genre to move to. It raise your heartbeat and you can zone out and just empty your mind. All the trance-hypnotic beats flood your brain and you're "no longer available" for the moment. It's good rage music. You don't have to talk, there're no lyrics to cling to, and it's just constant patterns of droning and thrumming and it fills your body. It's like, when the bass is bumping, it's your heart beating so it makes you feel alive. All you can do is close your eyes and move your body until you're not even you.

Rae's Dream...

When I woke up, I remembered the dream. It was only slightly, but I still remembered it.

I felt like something heavy was on me. Something was pulling on my shoulders.

Like at a swimming pool on a hot summer, someone jumping on your back and pulling you down in the water, but you don’t know who. When I woke up, there was a presence in my room that soon faded after a while. Like some person was standing there watching me sleep. Feeding thoughts into my head. It was all weird. Throughout the whole dream, I could touch myself in reality too. I rolled over once, careful to keep my hands together. Rolled over twice, moved a bit. The dream was weird too. I had an instant control over anybody and I could make them do exactly what I wanted them to do, just by telling them. Then I woke up, hot, sweaty, unsure of what reality was and what was a dream. I felt lost. Like, something was pulling me back into the dream world, but I decided to stay in the real world.

Call me crazy, but, I would like to go back to that experience. The control over the people in my dream was relentless. The power. I still remain weak at this moment. I’ll find a way though…I’ll find a way.